I was going to write a post about heartbreak sooner but I never really feel like I am doing it justice. Basically I was recently in a relationship with someone who I really loved but now we have ended. My love is still there and the memories chase me around, making the grieving period a lot more painful.
And however much people tell me to forget and move on, I'm struggling. This wasn't a choice I made, I can't process it and instead I have to clean up the aftermath; my broken heart which is in pieces.
One of my favourite sayings (yet I have no idea who said it) is "you have to play the cards your dealt in life". I really love card games (I have an awesome poker face) so when it comes to life I really understand this idea.
Although eager mathematicians claim that nothing is truly random in card games - life really is. This situation is just the latest one I have been dealt, and it's a pile of crap, but I have two options: fold and cave under the weight of the negative emotions I have (the ones that lead you to try and win your ex back, while just getting your heart broken further) or, you put on your poker face and try to be strong and carry on for the sake of your sanity - you may feel like falling apart but if you hold it together when you can, you are more likely to feel together and eventually, I hope, feel better.
I want to assure any of you that:
1. If you are also heartbroken that one you are not alone, I'm here and there are others too unfortunately.
2. When you get those days when you feel really low, let it out because you need to let the emotions happen, it's a bit of a roller coaster in the first few months as I'm finding out.
3. You will find love again, I'm sure of it, if you did love then you will again I promise.
This motto however also applies to other things like exams, job interviews, uni/college applications, family issues, everything really. You just have to face whatever you get dealt next but know that you can face it no matter what and reap the rewards of life. Remember too, well at least in my opinion, everything happens for a reason and it teaches you something and you have to carry that with you to improve your life, after all you learnt it because you needed to.
So deal me another hand please dealer, and let me hedge my bets on that,
All the best and lots of love guys,
Amber xx♥️
