Sunday 27 November 2011

Immortality of the Soul.

Readers, Friends,

Yesterday at 9.15am I lost my great-grandad John Henderson. He was 95. He had lived through the end of one and fought in the second World War. He was the strongest, kindest, cheekiest and loving man I have ever met. Me and my mum were by his side when he took his last breath. He held on to life until the very end. He was at peace and comfortable. I am honoured to of had him in my life. It's only when you watch life end that you really understand what life is and how wonderful it is.

The strangest thing is the advice people give you when you loose someone is similar to when you have a broken heart. It's mainly be strong and eat chocolate. Both are very good pieces of advice. However people tend to want to give you space but for me that's the last thing I want. If I sit on my own in the quiet all I will do is cry. It may sound ridiculous but when I am on my own and sad I am my own worst enemy. So all I have done is rally the girls around me and distracted myself. I will never be able to forget him but he would not want me to be beside myself and crying 24/7. School is a massive help. 6 hours a day when I don't have any extra headspace. Perfect. It never gets easier to get over loosing someone, the days just become easier to deal with. One at a time.

I hope this reaches out to anyone who has lost anyone. I wish you all the best.

Love,

Amber x

Grandad - RIP ♥

Sunday 6 November 2011

Crossroads.

Hey Guys,

I am so so sorry that I have been a bit distant recently. Life has definitely been interesting to say the least. I recently came back from India and landed myself several tonnes of homework in return and also had a few personal hiccups along the way... But I am officially back and ready to look into the future.

This post has been a long time coming and it is about the choices you make in life.

My theory is that every so often you look at a choice and you should visualise the decisions as paths of a crossroads, consider all reactions ( "every action has an opposite and equal reaction" Newtonian Law of Motion) and then make your move. If everyone did that then any third parties (the ones stuck in the middle) would suffer a lot less headaches and there would be less tears shed overall.

I also believe strongly that every person has to head down a certain path of the crossroads around the age of 15 (or though sometimes younger) and this is the one that decides what kind of person you are. Not who you are in terms of what job or life you will have; the path that decides how long your relationships will be, who with, how many relationships you will have, when (or) if you settle down... I am sure you get the drift!

All these factors depend on which personality path you take, if your nice or not, loving or evil, easy or actually has a grasp of self respect, desperate or happy to wait for love. From my observations people tend to head down the same path as all their friends, not only making them sheep but also living with a choice that they do not actually feel is right for them. This choice is important because people will judge you on it. If people get close to you and get put off by the choice you make then you may loose a perfectly good relationship for nothing. This has nothing to do with how you present yourself, its all about the inner person.

One example is the perfectly nice person on the surface and then the switch flicks and the deceitful person comes out who can break a heart. These people cannot be helped and you have to just get over them because they will never change, they could be a best friend, a lover, someone you give your heart to fully and out of nowhere comes a dark place they hide from the world. I hope you never find one, they are not very common I promise and trust me, it's not your fault they often have issues deeper than you could know.

On a lighter note, sometimes, you meet a person and cannot believe your luck because they are your match in every way and although it can take time, will be some of the truest of friends you will ever meet, when you find it treasure it because it will be the best thing that can happen to you.

To finish in time old fashion with a quote:

"In the progress of personality, first comes a declaration of independence, then a recognition of interdependence." Henry Van Dyke


Luv, Amber xx